American Ribbon
The BALD EAGLE NEST WEBPAGE,
 American Flag

 

*~--- FINE PRINT ---~*
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          Notice:     We still ain't responsible for the links that you link to from our pages.   These links are still the result of our private use and if you are using them, it's your business, not ours nor is it our concern cause, they were put here for our private use.     (Makin' sense??????)          So, what ever it is you are doing is cause you don't give a dang and are using these links at your own risk and your own business, subject to the restrictions of the applicable governing laws and the statues of the State you are in even if it is a state of total confusion!     You may or may not, directly or indirectly, provide the services for which you are receiving, have received or should have received the information you were contracted or not contracted to find or was it maybe blindly stumbling about unless, of course, you have already fallen and can't get up!     In such instances please access the proper facility's phone number and/or authorities phone number for the help you may or may not need (please, do not under the circumstances exceed the posted legal speed limits except in the case of emergencies and in those instances, proceed with extreme caution!     Don't try this at home.     Let the professionals damage themselves!)!

Copyright © 1998-2006.   Sandra and Harry Hunt.   All rights reserved.

          DISCLAIMER:     This copyright only applies to the making of these webpages and to the notice at the bottom of these pages to include this "disclaimer"!     We got no control over the links here-in that you try to link to from these pages!!!     If, on the outside chance, you run across some good ones (links) that you think we may like, let us know about it and in those instances, the above may be considered bunch of hooey, null and void of any real coherent thought as far as you not having any real reason to use these links or being "apart of" and we may decide to add them to our non-responsible list of links and thereby, YOU would be "apart of" these pages!)
(Sound enough like legaleze stuff??????)
(If not continue reading below!)
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*~--- More FINE PRINT ---~*

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CONTENTS:
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          US:

    Be it known that as used in this disclaimer, privacy statement, use of site, agreement, etc., here on down, that "The Bald Eagle Nest", "Eagle Nest", as "We" refer to ourselves will/can be also called, "We", "Us", "Our", "Me", "My", "I", "Us-ins", "We-ins", "Me-ins", "Our-ins" and/or any or whatever other "-ins" you or "We" can think of and "you", "your" and "yours" means you, the reader, the visitor.

          DISCLAIMER OF ENDORSEMENT:

    Reference to any products, services, processes, hypertext links to third, forth or fifth ("huh???   What happened to second") parties or other information by trade name, trademark, manufacturer, supplier or otherwise does not constitute or imply its endorsement, sponsorship or recommendation by The Bald Eagle Nest unless, of course We specifically say so but then We still aren't really recommending them and all other trademarks used are owned by their respective owners unless they are owned by someone else!

Links to third, forth or fifth ("huh once more???   What happened to second") party web sites, from this web site, are provided solely as a convenience to/for Us but as a secondary effect, for you.   If you use these links, that We like to use, you will leave our site ("bye-bye, so long farewell").   We have checked out the site you have linked to once, but have not reviewed on a regular basis, nor do We monitor which would be too much work, these third, forth or fifth ("huh, again???   What happened to second") party sites and We do not control ("control is just an illusion"), nor are We responsible for ("hey, We never were responsible except for the time We were apart of the "Service Patrol" in grade school in which all the other kids PROVED to Us, beyond a shadow of doubt, that responsibility is also an illusion!!!!"), any of these/those sites, their content or their privacy policy or if they've got any at all)("remember 'illusion'?").

          PRIVACY STATEMENT:

    This Privacy Policy outlines how We get the goods on you, forevermore called, "our information gathering" and what We do with it, again, forevermore called, "usage practices" for www.baldeaglenest.com.   Its purpose is to notify, or not, you of what goods or "personally identifiable information" of yours ("User Information") is collected ("one piece at a time"); how the information is used ("is there anyone who would buy it?   Yea sure!"); with whom the information may be shared ("everyone in the 'circle file`"); what choices are available to you regarding collection ("not one darn thing!"), use and distribution of the information ("see selling and circle file") what kind of security procedures are in place to protect the loss, misuse or alteration of information under Our control ("all goods we gather should and will be switched till totally unidentifiable") and how you can correct any inaccuracies in the information ("it is ALL inaccurate, especially your name so why change anything").

          USE OF SITE:

    We may share User Information, collected through our web site, with the round file also known as the trash can, thus We here by give you, the user, one opportunity not to use Our site so that the information being exchanged, that doesn't get exchanged, won't get exchanged with the circle file!   Local country laws are applied to something else where they differ from this policy of "trashed privacy!"

We are firmly committed, well, sort of but were one time committed then released on Our own recognizance to guarding the confidence you have placed in Our site ("don't make Me laugh, you put confidence in Us????") and to use, responsibly ("remember 'illusion'?") and professionally ("We sound professional???   Great"), any information you volunteer when you sign Our guest book or e-mail Us.   We strive to collect only those things that are collectable, eagles, letter openers, beanie' babes ("remember registered trade marks?"), and such other collectable things that interest Us be it 'spur of the moment' or in a more permanent manner.   We are committed to using the information collected only for these purposes, if We mentioned them above, plus those outlined below or to either side if there is an either side.   Our web site visitors from Europe and/or elsewhere outside the United States, should note that We have developed this policy or "say so" with the intent of complying with the International Safe Harbor, Safe House, Safe Hotel or Holiday Inn ("remember registered trade marks?"), Privacy Principles, Privacy Steps, Privacy Laws or Private Illusions between the United States, Europe and/or elsewhere.   If you do not want to share personal data, please read below for information on how to opt out or change personal information We collect from you when you send it to Us via e-mail or post it on Our Guest book.

          SWEEPSTAKES, CONTESTS & PROMOTIONS:

    Our Site NEVER sponsors sweepstakes, contests and promotions ("unless you qualify the pictures indicating different times of the year or holidays as 'promotions'.").   We don't have any contact data from Our promotions because We don't request any information from whom ever may use Our Site as We don't sponsor any of the afore mentioned things unless you do it with a site that you link to from ours and in that case, PLEASE, use protection BUT still be notified that We don't collect anything except as mentioned above!   If We should ever email you, We will never provide instructions explaining how to not to get e-mail from Us cause We would only be e-mailing you cause you asked a question directly, are a friend of Ours or you left your e-mail address in Our Guest Book.

          ONLINE STORE:

    We ain't got none!!!!!

          ONLINE SURVEYS:

    The only "online survey" We might have is in our Guest Book and I don't remember what it may or may not ask so if you don't want everyone to know, don't post it there...

          CLOTHESLINE SURVEYS:

    This is what used to happen in the neighborhood when women would "hang" their wash out to dry in the sun, not thrown into a metal box with hot air rushing around! (This type of survey should not be confused with the term "clothesline gossip"!

          OFFSHORE DRILLING:

    This occurrence generally happens out in the ocean and involves multi-million dollar oil companies and should not be confused with the local lake, a house boat or similar water craft and your date! (hopefully a female if you are a male!)   We should also mention that the term "offshore drilling" has no bearing, how sume-ever, with reguard to our web-site

          EMAIL NEWSLETTERS:

    This one is easy, We don't have one, yet.   May we add though, if more than 15,201 e-mails arrive asking us to do one we would seriously consider it and, you may ask, why the specific number of 15,201 e-mails?   It was just a number picked out of the hat!   The number "2" would do just as well but the other one seems more impressive.

          CORRECTING OR UPDATING YOUR PERSONAL INFO:

    To change or modify or remove information previously provided to Our Guest Book, We recommend that you resign the Guest Book and just tell everyone of the changes from the last time you posted your information there.   Any other personal information you want to give may be sent to Us via e-mail to ben@baldeaglenest.com .   Be informed that usually the only other personal information We may want is none except the one where you request Our snail mail address to send Us a million dollars U.S. currency (tax free of course!)!

          INFORMATION WE AUTOMATICALLY COLLECT:

    For each web visitor, We record date and time of visit, IP address and browser type to analyze how visitors use our site and to gather broad demographic information like country of origin and browser usage among our visitors.   This information is analyzed by somebody (?) and then purged on a regular basis just like I used to do when I'd have too many drinks!   I'd really purge but I got tired of purging and don't do that anymore!

This site contains links to other sites ("DUH!).   We are not responsible for the privacy practices or the content of such Web sites.

We do not use cookies to track session information and site usage patterns but We did eat cookies when We got the munchies, err hungry, but no more.   We presently like Our cookies with milk in the evenings and in the morning We like to dunk our chocolate chip cookies in Our coffee.   Yea, I know.   It sounds uckey but chocolate chip cookies in hot coffee really taste good and if the chocolate chip cookies are hard the hot coffee softens them up so that Our gums don't get ripped apart ("that can happen even with false teeth!").   We refrain from mentioning specific brand names of Our favorite cookies to comply with the "Cookie Non-Brand Name Compliance Requirements" set by the United States Federal Government.

Updates to our Privacy Policy will be announced on our Web site, clearly posted but rarely understood or read.

          PRIVACY AND CHILDREN:

    Our web site does not target children (defined as those persons under 13 years of age) unless they get in Our cross hairs, NAH, just joking, as an audience ("it is messy to clean up after they have spent any time in one place if you can keep them in one place") or a market ("selling kids is illegal, costs too much to keep them till they sell and it is too messy to clean up after them once they have spent any time in one place if you can keep them in one place for very long!"), and We do not collect information about the age of Our web site users.   We intend to comply with the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act of 1998.   I would have said that upon learning We have inadvertently collected personal information from a child We will make all reasonable efforts to delete that data from Our records but We don't have any data to delete except on the Guest Book where we once again claim We have no control who puts what there or in the 'circle file' along with the un-eaten pizza, apple cores and orange peels where it would be very messy and germ laden to retrieve information that anyone would want due to vermin laden stains attached to the information (UCK!).

          SECURITY:

    To protect the loss, misuse and alteration of the information under our control (remember illusion?), We have put in place appropriate physical, electronic, and managerial procedures to safeguard and secure the information We collect online ("Smith&Wesson, Fido, pull the plug, check an double check, backups").

We don't really do Jack Squat to protect the privacy of the information you provide.   It's on the Guest Book, a public page and you posted it.   We accept no liability for any unintentional disclosure on your part ("please keep your parts covered!").   In addition, in the unlikely event that any government or private individual seeks information, The Bald Eagle Nest will not voluntarily provide the information, but will obey any court order requiring disclosure from our public Guest Book ("all they have to do is go there and look!   It's not a private Guest Book cause if it was private how would anyone ever get to it to see who else had signed it? DUH!").

          TERMS OF USE:

    Thanks for dropping in but remember that if you drop from too great a height you just may bounce away after you hit!   By using this Site you agree to comply with and be bound by this Terms of Use Agreement ("Agreement") pretty much from the top to the bottom.   Therefore, please review the Agreement with studious care with a dictionary if necessary, I did!   If you do not agree with the Agreement just buzz off and do not use this Site (Keep It Simple Stupid - the KISS principle.   The very thing that this document is not!).

          ACCEPTANCE:

    By being here, you blindly agree to whatever We say ("terms") and do as I say not as I do principles ("conditions") of this Agreement, which establishes the entire agreement between you and Us-ins ("see way above for the "ins" thing!").   This Agreement supersedes all arrangements done made and those still in effect, representations and warranties and understandings, whether oral, written or anal (!), with respect to the Site, the Site contents and any services provided on the Site but please don't call Us, We'll call you.   In the event of any conflict between the Agreement and any other agreement or understanding related to this Site, this Agreement shall control unless you also believe that control is illusion.

          AMENDMENTS:

    This Agreement may be amended by Us whenever We want or We find need and your only notice of such updating shall be the posting of the amended Agreement on this Site.   You are therefore advised to review the Agreement each time you visit the Site especially if you are bored.   If you are not bored you will be after you take the half hour or so to re-read all this junk unless, of course, you fall asleep first!

          LIMITED RIGHT TO USE:

    The Site and the contents herein are the "engaged in activity requiring the creative use of the intellect" or intellectual property of Us-ins and are protected by applicable copyright, trademark and proprietary rights unless the applicable copyright, trademark or proprietary rights belong to someone else.   Viewing, printing or downloading of any content, graphic, form or document from this Site grants you only a limited nonexclusive license for your personal use and does not authorize republication, distribution, assignment, sublicense, sale, preparation of derivative works or any other use unless you have received Our-ins expressed written permission, by written word of mouth, for such use herein, therein, round-an-about or out-an-about.   No part of any content, for which We many be accused, or not, of having content or form except for (registered trademark) Jello forms which We like to put Our Jello in, or document may be reproduced in any form ("back to Jello") or incorporated into any information retrieval system ("would the world wide web be considered an information retrieval system?   Oh Yea, We-ins are putting it there so that's okay!"), electronic("same here, ya gotta get there from here or here from there") or mechanical ("when ya get here or there it has to be stored somewhere"), other than for your personal, not-for profit use except for comical (comedy plus) relief where there may or may be not be implied, imposed, imprisoned, impressed or some other word starting with an "i"!.   You do not acquire any ownership rights to Our Site or to any contents herein unless you pay Us some outrageous sum, dollars that is, for which We refuse to disclose cause everyone would want to be charging the same at their site expecting to make outrageous amounts of 'moo-la'!   All rights not expressly granted herein or should We say in this extremely elongated and bloated text, are reserved by Us-ins except in the case of linking back to Us.   The Bald Eagle Nest hereby grants you a non-exclusive license to establish an electronic link between your site and The Bald Eagle Nest Site by means expressed as "link to Us" whereby we furnish banners that is/can be exclusively linked back to Us from your site.   We disclaim all liability for those matters herein and forthwith called "content" located on your site where you might locate our banners that link back to Our Site.

          PRIVACY POLICY:

    Please review the Us-ins privacy policy.   By using this Site you agree that We-ins privacy policy, not to be confused with Our public policy, is part of "the" Agreement and may be updated when ever We want to without specific notice to you or written permission from you for Us-ins to do so.   The short workings of it is, "If'in yo is wanten to keep it private, don't tell no one!

          LICENSES:

    You agree not to download any software from this Site because We don't have any for you to download even if you really wanted to but you can access a link that takes you to a site, not Ours, that has software to download from their site but then you would be bound and gaged by any agreements, privacy policy's, licensees and/or disclaimers applicable to that site but not to Ours because you have already left Our site if you have the availability or are presently downloading any software.   We do offer non-exclusive license to establish an electronic link between your site and Ours as noted above under "Limited Right to Use".

          DISCLAIMER:

      1. ALL THE INFORMATION OR DIS-IMFORMATION, AS THE CASE MAY BE, ON THIS SITE IS PROVIDED "AS IS" AND THAT IS NON-NEGOTIABLE (CAN'T CHANGE IT FROM WHAT IT IS) AND ALL WARRANTIES, WARRENTS, OR WANTS, BILLS, EXPRESSED, IMPLIED, IMPRESSED OR IMPLANTED, ARE DISCLAIMED (NOT OWNED BY US-INS!)   (INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE DISCLAIMER OF ANY IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTIBILITY AND FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE FOR WHICH WE-INS AIN'T FIT FOR MUCH OF ANY PUROSE AND SURE AIN'T FIT TO SELL SO MERCHANTS DON'T NEED TO CHECK OUT OUR MERCHANTIBILITY CAUSE WE AIN'T SELLABLE UNLESS SOMEONE WANTED TO BUY US AND FOR THAT I'D FALL OVER PASSED OUT, BUT NOT ON OR IN, ALWAYS 'OUT'!).
      2. WE HAVE DISCUSSED AND DO DISCLAIM AND DISAVOW ALL LIABILITY OR LIE'S ABOUT MY BELLY FOR THOSE MATTERS WHEREIN, HEREIN ALSO THEREIN AND TWOTHWITH, FORTHWITH OR SIXTHWITH CALLED CONTENT, DISCONTENT, ANY DISPUTE OR DISSATISFACTION OF STUFF LOCATED ON, IN OR AT OUR SITE WHICH COULD BE CONSIDERED "COLSE" TO MY BELLY.   FURTHER, YOU AGREE TO INDEMNIFY AND HOLD US (AT ARM'S LENGTH, ANY CLOSER IS AT YOUR OWN RISK!) COMPLETLY HARMLESS, FINGERLESS AND TOELESS (FROSTBITE!) FROM ALL CLAIMS, DAMAGES, AND EXPENSES (INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, LITIGATION, LIBATION OR DEPREDATION, ATTORNEYS' FEES OR DUES) RELATING TO OR ARISING OUT OF YOUR BLOATED REACTIONS TO THE SPACE LOCATED BETWEEN THE TOP, BOTTOM AND SIDES OF YOUR SEREEN WHEN AT OUR URL.   ANY DESCREPENTIES ARISING OUT OF MISADDRESSED, MISLABLED OR UNLABLED QUOTES, QUIPS, CLIPS OR ART, AFTER BEING BROUGHT TO OUR ATTENTION WILL BE HAPPILY CHANGED, APPROIATE CREDIT WILL BE GIVEN FOR THAT ITEM OR REMOVED FROM OUR DOMAIN AFTER BEING ASKED TO CHANGE, GIVE CREDIT OR REMOVE THE OFFENDING THING UNLESS, OF COURSE, IT ISN'T REALLY OFFENDING BUT DEFENDING IT'S RIGHT TO EXIST IN CYBER SPACE, THE CYBER FRONTIER!   IF SUCH NOTICE IS NOT GIVEN WITHIN THIRTY (30) CALENDAR DAYS OF LEARNING OF THE FIRST OCCURRENCE OF SUCH ERROR, DISPUTE OR DISSATISFACTION WE, ALSO KNOW AS US-INS SHALL BE BLAMELESS AND HELD WITHOUT CONTEMPT AS TO ANY DESCREPENTIES AS LISTED ABOVE EXCEPT AT SUCH TIME AS IT IS THE END OF THE UNIVERSE AND ONLY, I REPEAT, ONCE AND ONLY WILL WE BE BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING OR ANYTHING YOU CAN COME UP WITH WITHIN THE FINAL 30 SECONDS OF OUR UNIVERSAL EXISTANCE.   AT THAT TIME, THE THING WE DON'T HAVE, THE "BUCK" WILL STOP HERE.....
      3. THE SITE AND SERVICE ARE PROVIDED ON AN "AS-IS" BASIS. US-INS DISCLAIM ANY WARRANTY OF FITNESS, FLABBINESS, THINNESS AND/OR ANY WARRANTY FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, NON-INFRINGEMENT, INFRINGEMENT OR FOR ANY-SUCH-THING THAT MAY HANG IN ANY SUCH DIRECTION NOR FROM ANYTHING. BALDEAGLESNEST.COM MAKES NO GUARANTEE WHATSOEVER ABOUT ANY SPECIFIC RESULTS FROM THE USE OF THE SITE OR SERVICE BUT IN MOST CASES, NON-SERVICE(S). BALDEAGLESNEST.COM MAKES NO GUARANTEE WHATSOEVER ABOUT THE ACCURACY OF THE INFORMATION LISTED IN, ON OR BY ITS DIRECTORIES. BALDEAGLESNEST.COM IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR INCORRECT OR INACCURATE CONTENT POSTED ON THE SITE AND FIND THAT IT IS THE RESPONSIBILITY OF THE VIEWER THAT MAY VIEW ANY SUCH INACCURATE THINGS TO REPORT, POST OR NOTIFY US WITHIN 30 SECONDS OF SUCH VIEWING THE AFORE MENTIONED SCR*W-UPS. BALDEAGLESNEST.COM ASSUMES NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR TECHNICAL, SCRATCHING, BENDING, STUPING, STANDING OR SETTING (OR IS IT SITTING) DIFFICULTIES, INCLUDING COMPUTER, OPERATOR, OPERATING OR THE LACK OF OPERATION MALFUNCTIONS, DISCONNECTS, AND SERVER OR RECEIVER FAILURE. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES WILL USINS BE RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE RESULTING FROM ANYONE'S USE OF THE SITE OR THE SERVICE AND/OR ANY CONTENT POSTED ON THE SITE OR TRANSMITTED TO THE USERS OF SAID SITE. BALDEAGLESNEST.COM DOES NOT ASSUME ANY RESPONSIBILITY OR LIABLITY FOR ANY 3RD, 2ND OR 1ST PARTY ADVERTISERS OR ANY OTHER 3RD, 2ND OR 1ST PARTY OFFER UNLESS, OF COUSE, THE PARTY IS "OFF SITE" AND IN SUCH CASES PARCIPATION IS A "AS-IS", CASE BY CASE INDIVIDUAL POSSIBLE USAGE AN THERE-FORE WEINS REFUSE TO BE HELD FOR ANY RESPONSIBILITY WHERE WE WOULD BE CONSIDERED NOT RESPONSIBLE IN A UNRESPONSIBLE WAY. YOU, AS ALWAYS IDENTIFIED JUST AS, THE USER, AGREES TO INDEMNIFY AND HOLD USINS, OUR SUBSIDIARIES, AFFILIATES, OFFICERS, AGENTS AND OTHER PARTNERS AND EMPLOYEES, EXCEPT AS NOTED AT THE DAIRY FARM WHICH WE DO NOT HAVE IN ANY COUNTY OR STATE, HARMLESS FROM ANY LOSS, LIABILITY, CLAIM OR DEMAND, INCLUDING REASONABLE ATTORNEY'S FEES, UNREASONABLE ATTORNEY'S FEES (FOR WHICH MOST ARE!), FOR ANY DISPUTE DUE TO OR ARISING OUT OF YOUR USE OF A 3RD, 2ND, OR 1ST TO INCLUDE 4TH OR 5TH PARTY OFFER OR COUNTER OFFER OR COUNTER-COUNTER OFFER OR ADVERTISEMENT, OR PROMOTION OR DEMOTION EITHOR WRITTEN, VISUALLY IMPARED, VERBAL, SILENTLY, VORACIOUSLY, VIDEO-LY (ON OR OFF CAMERA) SIGN-LANGUAGE OR ANY OTHER WAY IN WHICH ANYTHING MAY OR MAY NOT BE COMMUNICATED TO INCLUDE BUT NOT LIMITED TO VIRAL, ORAL AND OR CORAL (SINGING THAT IS!).

          LIMITATION OF LIABILITY:

    IN NO EVENT WILL WE-INS BE LIABLE, LEGALLY OBLIGATED OR RESPONSIBLE TO YOU, YO MAMA, UNCLE, ANT, AUNT, RELATIVE OR ANY INSECT, FOR ANY INDIRECT, DIRECT, SIDEWAYS, OVER, UNDER, SPECIAL, INCIDENTAL, CASUAL or ACCIDENTAL CHANCE OR CONSEQUENTIAL TO INCLUED SHOWING SELF-IMPORTANCE OR JUST SHOWING OFF, DAMAGES, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO ANY LOST PROFITS, LOST DATA, LOST SAVINGS, LOST COMPETANCE, OR LOST INLAWS SPECIFICALLY MOTHER-IN-LAWS, WHETHER BASED ON BREACH OF CONTRACT, BREACH OF WARRANTY, BREACH OF BIRTH, TORT (not the food kind of tort), PRODUCT LIABILITY, EVEN THOUGH WE DON'T HAVE A PHYSICAL PRODUCT EXCEPT FOR OUR INTELLECTUAL PRODUCT WHICH IS AND HAS BEEN CONSIDERED AND PROGNOSTICATED BY DOCTORS OF THE MIND AS BEING INCONSEQUENTIAL OR ANY OTHER LEGAL THEORY, THEOREM, THOUGHT OR SPECULATION BUT TO EXCLUDE DALMATIONS AND ALL OTHER BREEDS OF CANINES, EVEN IF We-ins, Us-ins or Our-ins HAS BEEN ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES.   (SOME STATES DO NOT ALLOW THE EXCLUSION OR LIMITATION OF SPECIAL, INCIDENTAL, OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES, SO THE ABOVE EXCLUSION OR LIMITATION MAY NOT APPLY TO YOU EXCEPT THEREIN WHERE THEY MAY APPLY EXCEPT, OF COURSE, WHERE YOU ARE IN A STATE OF CONFUSION.)

          GOVERNING LAW:

    By using this Site, you agree that this Agreement shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of the State of Confusion located in the United States of America, without regards to its conflict of law of the rights of passage, rules.   By using this Site you also agree that all litigation arising out of or in connection with this Agreement shall be bought in the state courts of the State of Confusion, where ever you can find it in the United States of America or, for matters involving federal jurisdiction, in the United States District Court for the Nonexistent District In Our State of Confusion....YA CAN'T HIT WHAT YA CAN'T SEE!!!

          COMMISSIONS AND PAYMENT SCHEDULE:

    The Baled Eagles Nest shall not pay you a single red cent or commission for visiting our little corner of the universe as We perceive it.   Put simply, it's Our universe, you don't like it, bugger off and build your own universe to play in.   Nor will We charge you a fee for visitation rights to view our Domain or ask you to set up any type of payment schedule for the privilege of visiting with us.   We are a freebee, (!) so ENJOY......

          PROMOTION RESTRICTIONS:

    You are welcome to promote Our web site on your web sites, but any promotion that mentions the Bald Eagle Nest Site, The Bald Eagle or Bald Eagle could be perceived by the public or the press as a joint (non-smokeable!) effort and to such ends We request the curtesy of visitation to include visualization as to the way you have linked back to Our site.   Upon request, We will reciprocate and add your link to our Domain in a manor that is consistent to those other links located at our Domain.

          EXTRA #1:

    The paragraph headings of this Agreement are for convenience only, and shall not be deemed to define, limit or describe the scope or intent of this Agreement.

          ANOTHER EXTRA #2:

    Should any provision, paragraph, sentence or bit of this Agreement be determined to be invalid or unenforceable under any law, rule or regulation, subjugation, jurisdiction or tradition, that determination shall not affect the validity or enforce ability or B.S. of any other provision of this Agreement.

          MORE EXTRA #3:

    We shall have no obligation to provide any services that we don't provide when and to the extent that We are prevented from doing so by equipment failure, fire, flood, earthquake, strike, lockout, war, revolution, riot, insurrection, revival, or any act of God or government or act of Scouts (Boy or Girl Scouts); provided that We-ins shall take any action reasonably practical and necessary to effect prompt resumption of the services like paying the bill.   In particular We shall not be deemed to have breached any provision of this Agreement or be in default hereunder, here over, or here through, as a result of any delay, failure in performance, or interruption of service resulting directly or indirectly from events beyond Our control.   FURTHERMORE, IN NO EVENT SHALL We-ins BE LIABLE FOR INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, LOST PROFITS, LOST MINES, LOST MINDS, LOST CATS, LOST DOGS AND/OR LOST INLAWS (FOR-SOTH, IN-TO AND THERE-FORE YOU SHOULD BE EXTREMLY HAPPY THE INLAWS ARE LOST ESPICALLY IN THOSE CASES WHERE-FOR THEY HAVE TURNED INTO A PAIN IN THE A** AND COMPLICATE YOUR LIFE BEYOND COMPLEXITIES...)!

          LAST EXTRA #4:

    Nothing contained herein, or in any other contract or agreement, or the business relationship between You-ins and Us-ins, shall be construed to constitute anything other than nonsense.   Further, visitors do hereby acknowledges that they have no proprietary interest in Us or clame to Us.

          DISPUTES:

    You, being the visitor, agree that all disputes, disagreements and/or traffic tickets arising out of or in connection with this Agreement shall be finally settled under the Rules of American Arbitration Association ("AAA") by one or more arbitrators appointed in accordance with said Rules that we designate.   The place of arbitration shall be Confused County, State of Confusion in the Country of your choice except in which Our choice would over rule, out qualify and beat up your choice (Na-na-nana-na Our choice is bigger than your choice!!!).   The parties (except in the case of "house parties", "block parties" or "birthday parties") hereby renounce, give away and throw off any right of recourse that they may have or thought they had before the court of any jurisdiction except to obtain preliminary or injunctive relief to which we advise the use of an antacid to afford the relief requested or enforce an award of the arbitrator.   If any award rendered by an arbitrator in accordance with this arbitration clause would not be capable of being executed in the jurisdiction of a party against whom a claim for payment is made or where that party resides or carries on business, or pleasure, neither the award nor said arbitration clause shall bar a party hereto from taking action before the courts that have jurisdiction over such other party with the exception of the above noted parties, "house, block or birthday".

          INDEMNITY:

    You agree to indemnify and hold USins, Our subsidiaries, affiliates, officers, agents, other partners, primary or secondary employees, grandparents, aunts, uncles, niches, nephews, mothers and fathers or brothers and sisters harmless from any loss to include loss of weight, liability, claims except in the case of mineral claims (or in reflection especially in case of mineral claims to which we could increase our holdings) or demand, to include demands from in-laws which can be especially annoying, including reasonable or unreasonable attorney's fees, made by any third, second, or first party due to or arising out of your use of the Site (this site or any other we lay claim to), the information here-in to include there-in or misinformation here-in to include there-in, in violation of this Agreement and/or arising from a breach and/or bloatation of these Terms of Use and/or any breach and again bloatation of your representations and warranties set forth and fifth above so help you ad-in-finum-itis!

          AND FINALLY;
CONTACT US:

    If you have any questions about this privacy statement, agreement, terms of use, the practices of this site, or your dealings with this Web site, you can contact:

The Bald Eagle Nest Web master
ben@baldeaglenest.com

SO HELP ME BY GOLLY GARSH JIMMITY GEE...............

P.S.     If ya really read down this far let us know!!!!!!! (I did once and had to send myself an e-mail just to let me know that I had made it!)

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